Four ways to accept and cherish yourself

By December 29, 2019 April 29th, 2020 No Comments

What a funny word, p e r f e c t.  When you stare at it, it looks even more weird.  Logic tells us that nobody and nothing is perfect.  But we all want it.


We all know that no human is perfect. Yet so many of us work to attain some level of perfection, whether it’s in how we dress, our work, our bodies, or our homes.  We all have seen the images of the flawless beauties and want to be that flawless.   But that type of flawlessness isn’t reality.


When I was in college, my father  – one of the most grounded people I ever knew – sent me a letter, and I want to share one line:


“Don’t confuse illusion with reality.  I’m not Robert Redford, and he sure as hell ain’t me.”


So, how can you embrace your reality – and cherish yourself more?


  1. Stop believing your own lies, especially “I’m not ___ enough” (go ahead, fill in the blank!). It’s easy to create a self-fulfilling prophecy here.  Your lies may stop you from caring for yourself, taking risks and meeting your full potential.  Shut those lies down FAST!  See them for what they are – fear and insecurity designed to stop you from being all you can be!


  1. Look at situations from multiple perspectives. What happens if person snaps at you when you are doing something you thought was extra-special for just for them?


You can tell yourself negative stories. “I offended them.” “It was the wrong thing to do.”


Or you can look at it a lot of different ways. “They’re having a bad day.” “They’re overwhelmed and get snappish instead of emotional.” “They’re tired and their boss just yelled at them.” You don’t know what is their inner reality.


What people say and do is about THEM; how you receive their responses is about YOU.


  1. Believe that life is always changing – and today’s reality will pass. Just because you are in a bad place today, does not mean you will be in a bad place tomorrow.  When King Solomon was asked for a phrase that was true in good times and bad, he responded, “This too shall pass.”  Life is constantly changing, and that means that we have new opportunities – in every moment of our lives – to embrace that change as the next exciting step on our journey.


  1. Embrace the compliments. I have a dear, wonderful, brilliant friend who deflected every compliment I gave her.  “It’s my job to know this.” “Anyone could do what I’m doing.”  I asked her to spend one week saying thank you each time some complimented her.  For the first time, she accepted compliments for what they are – someone reaching out to shine a light on something special about you.  It helped her see how unique she was to those around her – and helped beat down her “I’m not ____ enough”!



Each day, take a moment to stop, hug yourself and say I AM enough.  Your journey is unique to you, and you are perfectly imperfect – and imperfectly perfect for that journey!